May Contain Blueberries

the sometimes journal of Jeremy Beker

After looking at Elizabeth and I’s phone calling habits, we decided that having two phone lines and having long distance (and being charged a minimum fee for never using it) was just silly. So Elizabeth decided to get a cel phone, and we decided to cancel our second line and long distance.

Then began the good phone company call and the bad phone comapny call. The first job was to call was to Verizon and cancel the second line and tell them to turn off the long distance service on our main line. I called them around 12:15 and after manuvering menus for a bit, I got told that they were extremely busy and I should call back later. um. OK.

So I waited until about 1:30 and tried again. I relatively quickly got a live person who was very helpful. After canceling the second line she asked if I wanted to add call waiting or voicemail to the main line so people didn’t complain about getting a busy signal. I told her that was the idea, and she actually laughed as she finished up my business. She also was easily able to cancel my long distance service. Verizon gets an A

She recommended I call AT&T to tell them I was canceling the long distance service.

So I called AT&T. Now, I had to wander through about twelve menus to actually get a real person. Here is the conversation as I recall it it. Parts are paraphrased, but you will get the idea.

John: Thanks for calling AT&T, can I have your phone number and the name on the account.

Me: [gave information]

John: How can I help you?

Me: I would like to cancel my service.

John: OK, I see you have [blah blah blah] service, would you like to hear about our other plans.

Me: No.

John: We will give you 2 months free.

Me: No, I just want my service canceled, thank you.

John: Would you be interested in AT&T local calling service?

Me: No, I am not interested in any other service, and if you tell me about another one, I will want to speak with your manager.

John: Is there anything I can do to keep you as an AT&T customer?

Me: No, I make no long distance calls.

John: This other plan over here will give you free long distance.

Me: May I please speak with your manager.

[blessed silence]

John: I have a manger on the line.

Manager: How may I help you?

Me: I called today to cancel my service, but the gentleman I spoke with keeps trying to sell me more service even after I have explicitly informed him I do not want any more offers.

Manager: I’m sorry sir, but John is only doing his job to make sure that you understand all of the options available to you.

Me: I can accept that, but once I tell him that I am not interested in ANY service, I expect him to stop.

Manager: I apologize again for the trouble.

Me: Can you please confirm that my account has been canceled.

Manager: A block has been placed on the account so no charges will be made if you make no more calls until we get word from your local phone company to disconnect the service.

Me: Thank you.

Manager: Have a nice day.

AT&T gets an F, a double minus, fuck them in the ass F. Bastards. Thank god I am not going to send them any more money.